First, I really hope this is a troll.

Assuming good faith and that you aren’t trolling, the short version is: get the hell away from her.

How can she be your ex and you never fucked? Forget “she’s not yours, it’s just your turn”. It was never your turn to begin with.

Look, you’ve changed since when you were last “with her” or whatever. And she has an expectation that you are a beta buxxer, and that you will always be there for her, and that you can’t get laid.

It’s really hard to change ANYONE’S perception of you once it has been established, even more so women who think you are beta. When you do change, the people who knew the old you resist it, and think you are being fake. They want you to go back to being the old you because it’s comfortable and predictable for them. Once you’ve changed, it’s ALWAYS easier to just meet and associate with new people than change what they think of you.

OP, you are in a dangerous spot. It sounds like now you do fuck on the side, but your “ex” will not accept that, and wants you to go back to being her beta orbiter. Forget the graduation, forget this chick, if you keep her in your life, she will actively ruin what you have going with any plates you find, all to keep you in her orbit. Plus if she lives rent free in your head, it will damage any potential FWB or relationship you might get into down the road. Ask yourself: do you want your interactions with any girls down the line to be hamstrung by a woman who doesn’t even like you?

OP, I highly recommend not just ditching her graduation, but straight up cutting her off and ghosting her. This woman is like a vampire, who will suck up everything from you except what’s in your balls. If you have mutual friends with this chick, cut them off too. The new you isn’t compatible with her/her social circle.

And what the hell is this commitment before sex thing? It’s 2026, and you even know she’s a turbo slut. OP, run for the hills. Run for the hills, and the next valley over, and the mountains after that.

Hello everyone, I'm in a dilemma right now and I'd appreciate some direction.

An ex (a carousel cock rider) was the source of a severe oneitis back in my BP days. I never fucked her , was weak at escalating, swallowed a lot of lies, and she already had massive sexual experience when I met her.

When the oneitis hit rock bottom, I decided to break it off and fully focus on self-development. The breakup wasn't easy, but it paid off. I got back in shape, learned game, improved professionally, and started spinning plates. After that, she tried to get back into my life. I gave her a chance, escalated properly + solid make-out this time, and she showed signs of interest. But when I tried to close, she suddenly said she needed commitment and that she wouldn't fuck until marriage because she was "done having fun" (classic say from a CCR).

I told her I wasn't looking for anything serious. She said she loves me that’s why she wants me to commit ( Best beta she knew , but i changed untill then). I soft-nexted her. Later, she reached out again saying she wanted to travel with me , clearly trying to secure a beta-bux situation: invest resources first, maybe get sex later. I ghosted her. She tried reaching out three times over the following year. No response from me. Now, two years later, she sent me an invitation to her graduation. She's 26 now, so yeah she hit the wall.

Currently, I have one plate and one FWB. I'm wondering whether I should give her a chance, attend the graduation, reopen communication, and plate a former oneitis ( who knew me when i was in my BP days) , or stick to the rule: "don't dig through the trash." Has anyone here successfully plated a former oneitis without falling back into old mental patterns?

Thanks in advance.