Hello, I've never visited this forum before. But I run my own business and usually listen to hours of redpilled content every week on youtube for the last 4 or so years. I typed this out for a reddit post earlier but I realized reddit doesn't really allow any type of discussion like this. But yeah, feel free to roast me. I hope to contribute better to this community. But this is what I'm dealing with right now.

I've known a family going way back from my teen years when I was in kind of a cult/religion that i grew up in. Girl who was always the prettiest and a few yrs older than me, I sort of knew her, but I was like 14 when she was 18 and married, so didn't really know her all that well.

Her family is super cool with me, our parents kind of know each other. FB friends at least. I moved back to my boring hometown few years back and started dating and upping my game. I'm in early 30s now, just dumped my ex. She was very attractive but she disrespected me 24/7, non stop. Just wasn't worth it anymore.

Anyways, new girl txts me a few months back while still in a relationship with a guy, even at one point sending me a short video of her doing pole dancing. Not like stripping but still. I kinda laughed it off because I don't want some jealous dude looking at messages so i keep my distance. She calls me and txts me a lot a few weeks back saying she broke up with him 2 months ago. She would want to call and talk about our upbringing and all sorts of stuff and drama going on. She asked about my gf and I said i finally dumped her. Week later she asks about how im holding up and I said well I still hooked up with my ex last night but im fine. New girl invites me on boat with her family for the 4th. There's a guy there that she had told me she dated a decade ago and shes obsessed with her and she asked me how to let him down. But on the boat she actually would go smoke with him and at one point asked if he would take her home if she drank too much.

I leave early, thank her family, say they can come swim at my pool whenever, as I work a lot and no one uses it. Last week she txts me asking about hanging out in pool. I ran out of my meds and had just broken out in cold sores from getting burnt on the 4th.

She shows up at my house right before me when I tell her ill be off work. She is all dolled up. Tight bikini, did her hair, lots of makeup with the sparkley smokey eye shadow, extra nose ring in, etc. We chill and talk adn drink rest of day. Kinda drunk. We get in my hot tub late at night. Im not making any moves as I don't want a bad reputation with her family and stuff. At one point she comes over to me and is massaging my wrist and arm, talking about how i need to take care of my body cause I do blue collar work and she knows i work a lot.

Usually this is when I'd make a move and pull her in and then start escalating. But as I had like 4 cold sores coming up, I just didn't feel confident and figured I should just not even worry about it the first night. We go inside, she passes out on couch, i go to bed.

like 3 days pass, she asks about coming over again, i say sure. She's at my house all day and i finally get off work late. Dead tired, 12 hrs no breaks. We are chatting and having some drinks outside and after a few drinks couple hours into the evening she says "wanna hear how much of a slut i am". She then proceeds to tell me that the night after she came to my house, she got on tinder, drove 2 entire hours to bang some sort of ripped army dude. She goes in graphic detail about how he had washboard abs, and gets very very very detailed. Like absurdly detailed about it. Goes on and on and on about how hes so high up in the army and so ripped. I am currently not ripped as I lost weight due to working so much and naturally thin. Although I'm 6'2". She even tries showing me his profile. I basically just didn't say much and was just like hmm wow.

then we go in, have another couple drinks, til literally 1 am. She suddenly just seems drunk af and totally passes out mid sentence.

And thats it. I don't really care about seducing her or anything. I just, like, it really bruised my ego. I basically don't understand what even happened. Or what shes thinking. I guess I don't get the point of it all or what she was trying to accomplish. I was actually kind of enraged at the disrespect last night, but after waking up today and going to work i just thought shes got serious issues and may have been desperately craving validation after feeeling "rejected" by me. The truth was i find her really attractive and just was going to wait til the next time to escalate due to cold sores lmao. Or maybe she has like ultimately friendzoned me? Like damn near weird ass level of almost cuckolding lmao. I don't really know what to do now. I don't really want her coming over here anymore just to tell me about dudes shes banging and dumb stories. But I don't want to look butthurt either.

usually listen to hours of redpilled content every week on youtube for the last 4 or so years.

Most "Red Pill" YouTubers are perpetual anger-phase charlatans. The only 2 who really provide valuable info who come to mind at the moment are Rian Stone and Rollo Tomassi. The rest I know of are entertainment-only at best, and retards at worst. And of course, there are several I don't know much about, but my hopes aren't very high.

Anyway, your line I quoted plus your username tell me that you're still very much in the anger phase. While it's a necessary step in unplugging, it behooves you to move past it and start learning and growing.

Have you read the sidebar? Start there. You have much to learn, and most of YouTube is useless for that. Exception: Rian Stone has what he calls "the sidebar series" which are companion videos (NOT replacements) for the readings at both TRP and MRP's sidebars.

Anyway, about this particular woman and the situation you have:

When she came over that first night, she wanted you to fuck her. You were her first choice, and when you didn't fuck her, she went and got laid.

The stuff since then is a bunch of jealousy games to see how you respond. At this point, there's probably no "right" response except "I don't want to hear it".

But I don't want to look butthurt either.

Probably inevitable at this point, but so fucking what?

So this has happened twice. I will keep it short.

Recently, I met a girl at social gathering. Mind you, most guys were competing like retards for her attention at this place. But I just asked her one specific question through the night. I only asked her if she was from [a particular place in my country]. Then this guy laughed and said how would you know that? I said to both of them non nonchalantly "because of her accent".

Fast forward two days, I dont know how but she found my instagram. Added me and I added her back. We chatted a day or two and I immediately asked her to meetup. I wanted to lead with my own frame. She didn't resist and we met-up at a local bar.

Things started to feel off from here on. She had no personality. I mean, I was doing all the talking. She was insanely curious about me and what I thought about stuff. She started asking me if sales was a great career path. I didn't know why. She said she was interested. I started talking about the pros and cons but mostly the cons as to how brutal it is with the hours, constant churning, and travels. Its fun when young but its a game of survival of the fittest. I wont lie, I went on a tangent for whole 15 mins like a retard.

Now, she started asking me about my hobbies and oh boy. I went all in about this one particular hobby I have had for years. Through the night, it was just me talking, She just asked questions with dreamy eyes and I kept on going. I talked about a range of topics.

Then she hit me with something- she was 10 years younger than me. I am 30 and she was 20. I didnt react and she asked me what I thought of the age gap. I just shrugged it off and didnt pay attention to her question. I remember saying why would I think anything?

Then I suggested we go to a this view point in my city. It was a bit far but the car ride and the walk by the view point overlooking the skyline was romantic. Or So I thought.

We spent 30 mins there and then I said I am going to kiss you now because I find you very cute. She said no, sorry and something else [generic rejection]. I dropped her off and never reached out again.

My question is what kind of a vibe I probably gave off that whole night? I am pretty successful when I am not doing the talking with other chicks but whenever I have had to talk more than the girl, I have always been rejected.

This same story has played out previously as well with another chick who was younger than me by 6 years. They seem super interested at first and take the initiative. But then, well you know. I end up cock-blocking myself.