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@deeplydisturbed dude, this is a big part of my growth
I was never a "tool guy" when I was young. I was good at academics and athletics, but not that sort of thing.
When I was in my 20s and early 30s, I just threw money at shit that needed repairing. I could put on my spare tire and change my own oil, and that was just about all.
Once I got a couple of years into the apprenticeship for my trade, I became a lot more handy.
Over the years since, I've repaired a washing machine, a dryer, fixed a lot of other small shit around the house, and then that riding mower this past weekend.
Learning this shit was a huge departure from my comfort zone, and the knowledge has paid immense dividends.
@deeplydisturbed lmao no, I was already permanently suspended from reddit before I learned about the Shrek memes
And it's not a fetish!
Shrek is love.
Shrek is LIFE.
Birds don't like women. youtube.com/shorts/LpJT_VLxUpk?si=cD1WLZE9lLWtiGy0
@Stigma when that sort of shit happens to me, I'll usually act slightly amused and say something like "you're awfully trusting". If they keep at it too much, especially if they start telling me shit I don't want to know, I'll straight up tell them that I don't want to know.
Today, all three of the colleagues I work closest with began to confide in me. All three on separate occasions, began to divulge things to me they wouldn’t necessarily want people to know (or otherwise do want people to know and have found an outlet in me).
Now, I don’t like it, and I would like it to stop. I mostly don’t like it because I strongly believe their confidence is not due to traits I find positive in myself or them. They aren't how we might say ‘alpha’ traits - they see me as empathetic and having enough time to hear their woes.
Is there a way to pivot away from this dynamic, preferably as neutrally as possible?
Matt Forney
I vaguely remember that guy. If memory serves, he wasn't that good.
in fact in fact literally actually thoroughly literally
Little tip on writing: try not to be redundant and/or excessively wordy. If omitting a word doesn't change the meaning of a sentence, then omit it.
GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH A SAGUARO.
Ever heard the word "stalker" before?
No?
How about "creep"? SURELY you know that one.
Stop saying "men" when you mean "Chad". Stop it. Just stop it.
What?? Something is in the water this week... Bro, I pursue intimacy on the first date and usually end up banging about 85 percent of the time.
Don't make an assumption that all girls are shallow and immature. Some are some aren't. That shouldn't stop you from trying.
Get out there, start chatting girls up and escalate.
When is the right time after being in sort of a bond with a woman to pursue intimacy?
Ok, you're super new, and that's fine, but you have to realise you're super new.
You've got this part ass backwards. You do not "be in a sort of a bond" with a woman before persuing intimacy. That's the myth of "friends first", something that benefits only women.
Here's a very very simplified model:
- Demonstrate mutual attraction through flirting and emotional connection
- Demonstrate some sort of "prepared to walk away" and/or let her see you have other options (never state this directly).
- Build comfort and mutual investment (both of you make some effort) while physically escalating (touching, back off, not much kissing) 3b. Occasional playful emotionally-engaging attraction spikes so she doesn't get bored
- Escalate to somewhere more private
If logistics don't work out and you have to have another date:
- Swap contact details
- Do not commit to another date! (your attempt to lock her in will massively decrease your attractiveness)
- Agree to another date after a day or two (you don't have to ignore her, but you don't try to arrange a new date instantly - you're a busy man)
- At the next date you start right from the top, but you can fast forward through some bits.
Is it true that all the girls online are shallow and insecure ?
Yes and no. They vary. They are almost always more insecure than you. The shallowness varies. They all want a hot successful guy, so be that guy. This isn't really shallow, but it is a preference they hide so they have the option to exploit a beta later.
I've been thinking about cold approaching too I've done it in the past too but I'm getting nerves again so what would you guys advise?
Do it. Nothing will tune your social skills and build up your character like cold approaching.
If you're nervous then start gentle. You're sipping coffee. Girl nearby. You've already thought of three openers, use one of them without hesitation. If she's eating something: "That X looks good, would you recommend it to a friend?" Something she's wearing "Hi there..... that X looks good on you, where did you get it?"
These are not great chatup lines, but they are good for learning to get past your anxiety.
That sort of thing. A generic pattern that you can break out anytime any place. Learn not to think about it, because a clumsy line delivered as you sit down is worth more than the perfect like 5 minutes later.
Read MoreWhat happened to men pursuing girls?
I dunno, sometime around when women started complaining about it? #metoo
It would make sense that if a guy really really wanted to get to know you ....
Well, she almost figured it out there.
Men have learned that most women are NOT worth getting to know. We know how they operate now. We know their dualistic mating strategy. We know they are not worth persuing.
