She is extermely emotionally unstable. Everytime we have a fight she goes into a psychotic episode, ive never seen a person like this. Its a vey delicate situation because these people are dangerous, to themselves first but also they are prone to doing crazy shit and i dont want this thing from my past haunting me for the rest of my life. I've postponed the breakup for so long because i wanted to somehow make it right and have a amicable closure, unfortunately it seems that is not happening. Lately the relationship has turned abusive and im taking it like a chump, just being nice to her while trying to find a strategic way out, but i havent been able to. She lives with me so that makes things harder, i genuinely feel like the only way out is moving out and somehow creating a situation where she cant live with me anymore, then slowly let this all fade away. I repeat, sitting her down and beaking up is not an option, ive already tried this several times before and the aneurysm she gets into makes me take a step back, i genuinely am scared for her mental health but also for my security. I need a strategic way out and im asking for your help here

I was in this situation almost 20 years ago. In my case, she broke into my house repeatedly as i slept, including AFTER i screwed all the doors and windows shut from the inside. Cops got called out multiple times but the wheels of justice grind slowly particularly for men. When the court date for restraining and move out order finally came 45 days later, she shows up to contest it despite having active arrest warrants! The judge heard my testimony, then hers. He then granted me the maximum 3 years order, then 2 bailiffs materialized at her sides and led her off to the jail. Myself, and the previously busy and chaotic courtroom, were left in stunned silence.

I never heard from her again, but the whole experience took a lot out of me. It affected my reputation with neighbors, even though it was obvious that she was the psycho.

Now, practical what to do plans for you. As one cop told me bluntly, if her toothbrush is on the sink, they can't remove her, you must go through the formal eviction process in court. Procedures and requirements vary widely by jurisdiction so you have to look that up, follow requirements to the letter, and possibly engage an attorney or landlord's rights workshop.

If you can induce her to move out voluntarily, so much the better. You might find it strategic to offer some money toward a new place as a last resort, if so don't give her cash but pay it directly to new landlord and get receipts on paper.

She'll use every technique in the book to resist. You must find and hold on to your will and resolve throughout, and not cave an inch, because this will work against you in many ways including your self image.

Harden your heart against tears and other emotional manipulation. Expect that she will recruit others to take her side against you.

Hard lesson in never letting a woman move in with you before wedding day. It makes you feel like a baller at first, but can go wrong and become a trap in so many ways.

Time to take on steel resolve and act with cold decisiveness. The men here will help you work through this tough process, but we're generally not keen on helping maintain defense mechanisms and betaish indecision.