@Machiaspinner

Is it just a matter of time untill this plate will break

Hello everyone

I've been seeing this girl for about two months. She lives in another city (1h by car) where I have some friends, so I only go there once a month. She's 21F, around a 7.5/10, and the first dates went really well , she showed interest, escalation was smooth.

On our second date we made out, but I had to go back to my city. She later came to visit me, I invited her to dinner, we hooked up and she spent the night. I saw her again when I went to her city, we slept together again.

The issue started when I told her I had a “surprise” for her. What I meant was that I was going to give her a very good time in bed , and I did , she complimented me at bed but who cares she can say this to everyone . She later mentioned she was “waiting for the surprise,” and I got the impression she was expecting something material, which I’m not doing.

Then she reached out again, saying she wanted to come to my city, but she kept pushing to know exactly what we were going to do and if it gonna be more interesting than last times , almost like if my plan didn’t impress her, she wouldn’t come. I told her to come and discover, but she kept insisting. After that she sent me some sexy picture in the lingerie she was wearing last time , and asked me if i miss the red cold , i liked the picture and told her i like red color and looking to see what she gonna wear next time in order to not seem needy .

Looking back, the problem is that I positioned myself as a provider. She’s a student, and I paid for all the dates and now she’s pushing for more. She does show some qualities for an LTR, but since it would be long-distance, I’m questioning if it’s worth it especially that she is hypersexual.

So now I’m wondering: Should I see her one last time and close it properly, or should I just walk away and consider this plate done (She is the only plate i sleep with i have now ,but i'm seeing other girls , scarcity...) ?

Some guys come through here claiming to be banging overseas, while many don't. Whether they are or not isn't the point. What you might consider long distance for yourself, another guy might at worst see as just a mildly tedious commute, as such, 'long distance' won't apply in this situation due those variables. In time, you might be able to realize more convenient fornication opportunities, but I don't imagine you achieving them with this chick without some serious headache.

For now, you should study the book and limit how much time a month you spend on her. This female being a college student usually means that she's both sexually more experienced with guys than you are with females and earns a low-income, so whenever you take her out her empty purse shouldn't be a surprise.

That you value your professional time and energy differently than your personal time and energy is the problem, which is why so many guys position themselves as a provider. Unfortunately, the situation is that your game is inferior to this females ability to manipulate men. Your willingness to spend time communicating with her remotely, expend energy traveling by car to spend time with her, and your eagerness to host her at your place not only revealed your level of interest, but also made her aware that she's got no competition for you.

That she's been willing to travel to your place suggests that so far you haven't done anything to kill her interest, which is good, but you should definitely listen to your gut and continue engaging other females so as to create abundance through stacking plates. I'd also suggest that you seriously reconsider how you value your personal the time and energy differently than how you value the time and energy you spend at work.

@First-light

This is very good. The truth put simply. Nice find.

"A half truth is the worst of all lies, because it can be defended in partiality."

― Solon

Here's the other half TRP guys prefer to tune out courtesy of No Choice from "Stonetoss". As always, my condolences to those whom this tragedy applies. Hopefully, this thread will provide insight on a topic TRP regulars avoid discussing.

As I've mentioned regarding my own experiences with, and observations of, pedophiles, I've found that many are too profoundly traumatized psychologically to exercise any discernible control of themselves. As such, I'll use this opportunity to re-introduce everyone to "Crisis Magazine" articles I first plugged in the public square some years ago originally published in 2016 by #JosephNicolosi entitled The Traumatic Foundation of Male Homosexuality and The Traumatic Foundation of Gender Dysphoria

@dizzyboi

Women Leave for Happiness — What If I’m the Unhappy One?

I’ve been married 15 years. Good career(6 figs), stay in shape, live with intention. I realized that I’ve been slowly shrinking to fit inside my wifes comfort zone. Sacrificing myself to try to make her happy by doing what i thought i was supposed to (provide/protect/etc), but....i dont get really anything in return.

My wife is a good woman in the traditional sense — cooks, cleans, caring and loyal. But emotionally, nada. She’s avoidant, defensive and resists everything outside her comfort zone. No hobbies, no curiosity, no willingness.

She says she’s “content but not happy.” I feel obligation, loyalty, and compassion… but no spark, no partnership, no real life together beyond logistics and chores.

Here’s the part I’m wrestling with:

Red Pill talks a lot about women leaving men “because they weren’t happy” — and how men get blindsided. So what happens when I’m the one who isn’t happy? Am I doing the same thing, just in reverse?

I’m not blaming her for everything. I own my mistakes, but she is "dismissive-avoidant".

I’m at the point where separation feels like the only path but part of me wonders if I’m falling into the same trap RP warns about-- chasing “happiness.”

I’m not chasing excitement. I’m chasing a partner who actually engages.

So here’s my question to this community:

How do you tell the difference between:

“I’m unhappy, so I’m leaving” (the thing men get burned by) vs “The relationship has hit a dead end because we’re fundamentally incompatible in growth, effort, and emotional connection.”

I’ve been married 15 years. Good career(6 figs), stay in shape, live with intention. I realized that I’ve been slowly shrinking to fit inside my wifes comfort zone. Sacrificing myself to try to make her happy by doing what i thought i was supposed to (provide/protect/etc), but....i dont get really anything in return.

My wife is a good woman in the traditional sense — cooks, cleans, caring and loyal. But emotionally, nada. She’s avoidant, defensive and resists everything outside her comfort zone. No hobbies, no curiosity, no willingness.

She says she’s “content but not happy.” I feel obligation, loyalty, and compassion… but no spark, no partnership, no real life together beyond logistics and chores.

Here’s the part I’m wrestling with:

Red Pill talks a lot about women leaving men “because they weren’t happy” — and how men get blindsided. So what happens when I’m the one who isn’t happy? Am I doing the same thing, just in reverse?

I’m not blaming her for everything. I own my mistakes, but she is "dismissive-avoidant" ( emotional distance, withdrawal, stonewalling, defensiveness, and difficulty with intimacy/affection)

I’m at the point where separation feels like the only path but part of me wonders if I’m falling into the same trap Red Pill warns about: chasing “happiness.”

Except… I’m not chasing excitement or novelty. I’m chasing life. Growth. A partner who actually engages.

So here’s my question to this community:

How do you tell the difference between:

“I’m unhappy, so I’m leaving” (the thing men get burned by) vs “The relationship has hit a dead end because we’re fundamentally incompatible in growth, effort, and emotional connection.”

I’m trying to avoid cope. I want clarity if this all on me, a natural mismatch, or a necessary hard decision. Friends say, leave & be happy. Maybe I need to man up?

Plan to separate around new year, if not sooner.

I don't disagree with the idea that it's not any mans responsibility to be the source or well spring of happiness in another persons life. Happiness is temporary, fleeting, that's why we value it so much. If she's otherwise content in her relationship with you, you're doing awesome as far as any guys would be concerned. I can only hope that in the litany of questions you've given your wife over the years after noticing her unhappiness, it has helped you to discern if her feelings are purely coincidental to occurring in the marriage, or explicitly due to it. Once you pull the trigger, it will be a very challenging thing for obvious reasons to undo should you change your mind. However, when everything is said and done you don't need our permission or approval with what you're about to initiate.

Whether you do or not, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.

@DrSuperAceStar

So I’m 25, 5 10 “, 250lb blankan, I had a girlfriend for 2 days then wimped out didn’t even reach first date before I checked out. I’m wondering on what to do I’m hitting like a plateau in lifting I bench max 150 but I’m losing motivation I haven’t done squats but the part to keep me going is not there I need help on that. Also the mental to not give up before first date. I have a court case pending but lawyer says it might be dismissed assault criminal damaging and menacing charges. I’m on disability cause of my accident where the lawnmower severed my toe. What do I do?

Follow your attorneys best advice about your legal matters, your physicians best advice regarding your post surgery, and run those fitness concerns past your gyms personal trainer about these fitness problems, if one's available to you.

Beyond that, consider investing into a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, who until his passing was also known as Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several mens focused sites and a podcast. His media is a bit pricey, but it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from in RP aware circles. I'd suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his #book is something you'd like to add to your library. It should also be available on libgen.