This is actually similar to a problem I’ve noticed with “friends” in my life the last few years. Essentially, most people are so BP and game-poor that they aren’t just ineffective wingmen, they are negative utility on that front.

Guy friends that have no game and are BP usually don’t believe that sowing your oats as a man is ethical. That’s before we ask if they even COULD do it themselves or help you do so as a wingman. They will hold you back if you are having success. And don’t even get me started on female “friends”. All these “friends”, even if they say they want to wingman for you, really have the interests of random women they don’t know at heart as well, so they really don’t want to help you get laid. They think it’s “wrong” for men to sleep around (but when women do it they are empowered, teehee). These people would have you turn a club slut into an GF. And again, that’s if they even have any game knowledge or ability in the first place. Someone like that, in my experience, can never help you as a wingman.

In my few years of my RP journey, I’ve improved a lot from my former 0 success self. And I’m still on the journey, not done at all. And one important thing I’ve noticed: every time I’ve managed to bang a chick, I’ve either gone out alone or with my 1 or 2 game-aware guy friends. Never some bumbling BP nice guy, and certainly never with a female “friends”. It has just literally never happened with a BP friend. Literally never, 0 times.

Conclusion: most people are BP and have the interests of random women at heart more than your own male interests, even so called friends. Therefore, you can’t rely on them to help you in any wingman position whatsoever. They are typically negative utility, and are a liability for gaming women. If you want a wingman, find someone who is game-savvy. Even if they don’t call it game, you will know these men when you see them behave out in the wild.

And one last thing OP: when it comes to talking game or women I’ve banged, I’ve learned to never share this info with the BPers, at least overtly. Know when to keep your mouth shut. If you want to talk field reports and game, keep it to non-BP friends. I never talk about my lays with BPers, as it simply doesn’t help me.

If you do want to share with BP friends, remember to only do so strategically. And remember, since BP people behave like women, communicate your success covertly, that will work much better like it does with literal women.

VRX Social Dance Guide:

Part III (Advanced Kino)

Part I (Game)

Part II (The Scene)

Back with another dance venue guide. If your social skills are not good (enough) this guide is not for you. Get that social xp in first.

FYI, I do swing dance within night game, so your style of dance and mileage may vary.

Table of Contents

I | Key Differences From Standard Game
II | When To Use Dance Kino
III | Advanced Dance Kino
IV | When To Switch To Standard Game Kino
V | Social Considerations

I | Key Differences From Standard Game

The primary difference between dance-specific kino and the regular game version of kino is that dance inherently involves physical contact from the outset. There is a stigma to outright admitting you wanted to dance with someone because you want to bang them as your motive, so unless otherwise indicated, touch is "just dance" so don't start out crazy with this guide.

The good thing about dance though, is that it breaks the touch barrier you'd otherwise have to break later in a standard game set, and you get to touch more intimate areas of their bodies faster, and actually immediately in many cases (neck, stomach, legs, etc.). This guide centers around maximizing default touch permissions in dance.

Getting carried away like a socially inept sperg will give women "the ick" and they will tell all their friends and guys they know that "you are a creep" if you Leeroy Jenkins your dance kino. Also, men who see you overwhelmingly succeed with touching women and seeing them touch back will get you a lot of hate that you'll have to have the fortitude to ignore.

You've been WARNED, this guide will turn you into the local dance scene villain in exchange for a higher and faster return rate with women.

II | When To Use Dance Kino

When, exactly, to use more advanced dance kino depends largely on the kind of opportunities that you are presented with, because how, when, where, and why you even interact with any given follow will be unpredictable and have no specific timeline.

Whether her group of friends is with her, how much she's had to drink, whether other people have recommended you as a dance that she sought out, what her initial interest in you was before you two even danced, even how old or young she is, AND ESPECIALLY if she has already started touching you first, will dramatically affect the flow of your strategy.

Three basic dance scenarios you'll have to kino (in order of effectiveness)

1. Using her for dance move demonstrations

2. Teaching her moves

3. While dancing with them on the dance floor

I did not include regular game kino in between dances or places like outside or at the bar, but assuming you've warmed her up enough from some subtle dance kino, regular escalation is the most effective kill shot when she is interested enough to try it.

In these three scenarios, you can pretty much use the below tips immediately or near immediately depending on your confidence and accurately read on the rapport you can instantly establish. I've rarely encountered frigid women that react poorly to these, but they do exist, just next them immediately and focus on fun women only, which is most of them there. Discomfort is very uncommon if you have a good read on how to use these properly.

III | Advanced Dance Kino

The initial approach or meet

Your first opportunity to kino them actually does matter and is a huge filter and way to make an impression in their lizard brains and set unstated expectations as well.

Your first approach

The first thing you should do if you approach them, if they haven't already seen you coming, is approach them from as sideways as possible so their peripheral vision sees you even if just subconsciously. This prevents them from being spooked and less prone to reacting weirdly to surprise touches. Do not kino them from behind unless they are absolutely blocked in on all sides and that's all you can manage, and even then, try to be diagonal from them to their shoulder and not from behind them. Yes, it matters, I've ruined many approaches from behind.

Go up to them and place your hand flat and on their shoulder, maybe even just below their shoulder, arm or upper or lower back if you must, you don't need to be anal about it. Place your palm wherever semi-firmly, about the pressure between a wet napkin and a light grip. They should feel it but not so much that it feels pathetic or jarring. Don't move your hand around once it's there or they'll consider that "creepy." Wait till they turn around and give any standard line "Hey, confident smile would you like to dance?" If you want to be particularly high-risk, high-reward, let your hand linger after they turn around and until they answer your question all the way before removing it.

This filters out frigid women who don't ever want to be touched by you specifically and of the ones who don't mind or like it from you. You will also seem more confident anyway and it sets you up for more touch later. If they react poorly just say "have a good night" and move on, they are timewasters.

The first meet

I say meet because sometimes people bring girls to you, so they technically approached you instead. If someone brings them to you, you have two choices: handshake or hug.

Handshake: they will usually try to shake your hand when they are introduced to you, but make sure it is the man-to-woman greeting and not a standard business handshake. Doing so makes sure they are aware of your sexes by doing this, which makes it easier for them to mentally be in your lead from the get-go and that you are very much male, which makes gaming them easier if they are aware of their femaleness and therefore femininity.

Hug: I rarely do this but depending on your rapport level with the person introducing you and if you happen to hug that person in the same instance sometimes you can hug. It does build instant rapport but doesn't have much sexual escalation value. It can make her feel like she has known you much longer though but only do it if her friends are already hugging you first and the introduction comes during or just after that.

If a girl approaches you and is not introduced to you, just get on the dance floor if she asks you to dance, and just take her hand and lead her to the floor, nothing special or fancy. If she approaches but doesn't ask you to dance immediately, just small talk her or ask her to dance or wait to see if she asks you to dance. Some girls get intimidated to ask and fear rejection, so the small talk is just their way of getting asked by you.

The first dance

You will more than likely have a first dance with a girl before ever being in a situation where you would be teaching them or using them as a demo, but not necessarily. I have met a lot of random women by going up to them and asking them if I can borrow them for a quick demo. The vast majority have said yes but your mileage may vary depending on your perceived or actual confidence level. My friends also feed me women to teach like no one's business, so again your mileage may vary here.

When you first dance with a girl, do easy enough moves that she doesn't get quickly discouraged or overthink moves, which will just take away from your game and her willingness to continue. Start with normal hand placement, don't game fancy or anything. Run any or no verbal game here, do what works for your skills at this point. "Where are you from? What do you do? How long have you been dancing? What got you into dancing?" are perfect enough intro chats to have across one to two songs while she gets comfortable with you and/or more interested in who you are as a person.

If she does something like laugh, you can squeeze her arm or shoulder lightly and smile, or if she has a wardrobe malfunction like a shirt strap falling down you can put it back on her shoulder (might rub some girls wrong though). When the dance is over either double high five and "that was good/fun" and make sure you do a light hand squeeze for a split second while maintaining eye contact with her or ask her name and do the man to woman handshake. No hugs here unless she is super excited and her body language is clearly aiming for it. I usually don't ask their name, Roosh V had good advice in Day Bang that if women are interested, they'll ask for your name first.

Subsequent dances

If you have already had your first round with her on the dance floor, then I would say it's a lot safer to escalate more with your moves and hand placement on later dances, especially if she already knows or has since learned more moves from you.

Getting onto the dance floor

A lot of people don't realize how much you can get away with or do here. You can put a girl's hand on your shoulder as you walk her to the floor or if the mood is right, you can pick her up and princess carry her to the dance floor if you're not far. The latter is rare and don't overdo the princess carry, don't be that guy.

Hand placement

Usually behind their left shoulder is the most common place to have your right hand and it is the most expected and the most formal. Depending on your risk assessment and confidence, there are some other options for your right hand: their left hip, their upper back, their lower back. I've even seen a Chad that was tall enough he would just dance with his arm around their neck all the way over to their right shoulder, it very much works for him.

These alternative hand placements are not formal locations and so any girl that tolerates or lets you do it repeatedly is probably more likely than not more interested in you than not. Same as above, if she laughs or something you can squeeze these locations, etc.

Whatever you do, no ass grabs dancing. It's tacky and everyone sees it. Men will judge you for having your hand anywhere that isn't a shoulder anyway so fuck them and what they think, just don't do any tacky ass holds.

Game and banter

You can do other playful nonsense on the dance floor depending on if you are doing well with her or she seems interested or you just want to escalate and banter. One of my favorites is when they keep missing my hand to get on the dance floor and the result is they keep patting my hand, so I start jokingly doing a hand slap fight with their hands, they usually laugh and enjoy it. I also like moving their hair out of their face and behind their ear mid song if it blocks their eyes, I've never really had any pushback for that.

When I've been dancing with a girl already, you can give them a hug (the less platonic the better) after a turn ends. Two good ways to do this: finish on a dip which is one of the most common song endings anyway or pull her in from a spin into a hug. Or you can do the double high-five with a squeeze or get out of a closed position by sliding your hand off their back or shoulders. You can also slide your hand(s) off their back after a hug too. Another alternative is to grab their hand (or if you were already holding onto it from your song-ending move) say "find me again" and squeeze their hand after lingering it for a moment.

Sexy moves

Some moves are just more inherently more sexual than others like certain dips or moves that use leg touching or stomach touching slides. Either do these or add additional hot flair to non-sexual moves such as hand slides if it makes sense to even do that flair for a move.

I have a few swing-dance moves in my arsenal that involve straddling me, choking them by the neck (seriously, and some even like it hard), leg touches, one where my knee can unintentionally or otherwise put pressure between their legs, and a stomach slide that I've noticed women can't help but verbally respond to, as in, they actually comment on how good it feels and make sexual comments to me outright, surprisingly as that seems.

Some girls really don't like sexy moves, and they will say so. It's also a good indicator she will never bang you so give up on her as a prospect if she says she doesn't like the sexy ones. Don't take it personally, just respect your time and cut your losses she is going to be like that to everyone and then settle on a square of a dude. Next.

After the dance

Assuming no one else asks her or you to dance immediately after your turn ends, you can do what I suggested for the first dance options or walk off the floor with her with your arm around her back to her waist, which is easy to do from a hug or just in general. It's a good sign if she doesn't end that early and does it back. There aren't any other forms of kino I would really recommend while walking off the floor that have any good return on investment.

A good alternative follow-up is to ask her if she wants to get a drink at the bar or water before you two get off the floor and then escalate in line or at your table with standard kino game if the vibe is ready for it.

Teaching

Why teaching is easy kino

While most of the high chemistry you will have is on the dance floor (it's just how women think and feel emotionally about good dance), I find that teaching them offers the best seed-sowing for physical escalation. That and even if her friends are watching you and hovering around her can work your magic without them giving protective pushback. If anything, their friends will cheer her on when she gets that move down and she might even funnel her more interested and hotter friend to you if she's not interested in the end.

Teaching them is particularly deadly because the very nature of teaching means doing moves slowly across prolonged and repeated movements where you have to keep your hands longer on intimate places like their legs, neck, and other areas of their body. You often have to also hold them up and in more to keep them standing so they don't get tired doing it slower. Teaching is also just loaded to the brim with unlimited plausible deniability.

Verbal communication

I will emphasize that verbal communication is going to give you the most plausible deniability for extended and even ballsy physical contact. I would say anything that has no direct teaching value is going under the ballsy category (like lingering on her when you two are just standing and conversing or someone else is randomly talking to both of you, or you show the same thing twice after she definitely already heard you and understood, etc.)

I almost always communicate very clearly about where and why I am going to touch them, as it adds rapport, removes any defense to my real intentions, and gives them perceived control of their comfort zones to know what's coming: "I'm going to grab your leg, I'm going to reach for your neck, I'm going to put your hand on my bicep, I'm going to slide your hand around my back." I have found that I get virtually zero resistance whatsoever even with complete randoms I've never met because my communication about my actions is crystal clear, especially when they don't even know which move I'm about to do. Physically escalating on a girl who offers zero pushback or discomfort whatsoever is the most ideal setup for going advanced touch as fast as possible.

Emphasizing (The Touch and Tell Technique)

Touching, rather than just telling, a girl what to do is way better for you and her interest level in you. By physically gesturing on or touching something on them to teach them what to do is more effective. You can go simple or more ballsy here.

Example: you are showing a follow how to dip, you need her to lift her left knee up, rather than saying "lift you left knee" you press your index finger onto her thigh of that leg, or you do more, such as put all five fingers on her leg with an arched palm, or you put your entire palm on that leg for an instant or a longer moment while you explain the move action further.

You can go more advanced as well, "I need you to lift your left knee" and then you put all your fingers on it and then run your fingers back and forth once to emphasize: this knee. It's an action emphasis so she won't question it but she will FEEL it. There is more you can do such as double tapping a body part to emphasize or a light squeeze. I find the resting palm to be the most conducive to serving as game escalation. Especially if you are doing neck dips or using their neck and your full hand rests on their neck for a good minute while you talk and explain the moves details.

You can also take their hand and put it on the part of your body you need them to do, like your arm or chest if the move uses those body parts on you and you can hold their hand over theirs for a moment while you talk, so now they are touching YOU because you emphasized with their hand instead of just telling them. Congrats Champ, you're escalating and she doesn't even know it because muh teaching.

Corrections

Physically correcting their body is an easy freebie to touch them and for as long as necessary enough, as unnecessary corrections are inherently counterproductive for learning and would make no sense to do. The most common example I have is for correcting their raised knee on a dip:

Many of them will not understand the angle or height for it even after you've done the touch and tell technique. If they raise their whole leg out forward, foot and all, I put their arm around me deeper and get my whole body closer and more under them so they can lean on me and hang onto me better, I then grab their calf firmly and tuck it in and then I grab their knee and raise their leg for them, sometimes more by the hamstring, and sometimes give a pat on their thigh after and say "there, like that," and then I reposition them on me to explain the remainder of the move.

There are countless moves that they mess up that need correction, so this applies to so many body parts and plenty of excuses to touch and tell them. And the best part is that they just about always appreciate it, too!

Stability

Having to physically balance and stabilize her, yourself, or both of you is such an insane touch freebie. One of my common ones is that if they don't understand the leg raise and it's not a typical dip or at an angle that makes sense to grab their leg, I will stand with my arm around them for balance and I will lift my leg as a demo. I keep my arm around them till they understand and repeat if need be.

There are many moves where they need to use their whole body to get into a position and if they are on one leg you can move all their body parts into place. This is usually good and needed for beginners who don't have much skill and struggle with verbal instruction anyway.

Sometimes girls will stabilize themselves on you voluntarily to fix their shoe or pants or whatever, great if they do that just hold them up with more than you need to. I have found the more contact the better, but your mileage may vary. Like I said the women who are uncomfortable should have already ejected from you well before this point.

Miscellaneous

There are other miscellaneous opportunities I regularly use such as moving their hair out of the way if I need access to their neck or spine, even if it is completely and utterly unnecessary to move their hair for those body parts. If I can make use of it I will, they don't know their hair isn't actually in the way, but it feels like it when I move it. Again, the double high-five or a hug for them getting a move down is just fine to recycle and it rarely if at all gets old.

One thing I like to do is be playful if they accidentally hit you, scratch you, or injure you during a move. You can accuse them of being "abusive" and push them away playfully if they try to touch you to comfort you. Or you can laugh and hug them for a surprisingly decent amount of time while you talk about your injury or do both one after the other in the above order.

I've certainly told girls they owe me a drink after they injure me and then just kino in the bar line and continue being playful.

Demonstrations (demos)

Difference between teaching and a demo

Teaching is often one-on-one, even if her friends are nearby or hovering. There is very little communication between you and others because you are just going from A to B on teaching her. When you ask a girl (or better yet she eagerly volunteers herself because she loves when you have her as your demo star) it is because you are showing someone else how to do the move and showing someone else how to do a move requires a fairly different approach than someone directly experiencing the move.

During demos you will have plenty of idle time and your kino interactions are potentially limitless during a good 10-20 minute, not to mention that you will look very confident and proficient teaching and doing a spontaneous demo from anywhere to 1-4 people or more even, which soaks already wet panties when she sees the star you are in her brain.

Touch duration and frequency

The biggest difference will be the extended intimate lingering, even more so than direct one-on-one teaching just her, and often times you'll have to repeat the same intimate touches multiple times, and slowly, for the observer. Often times your placement duration and frequency depends on if the observer is a fast learner or struggling.

I like to start at what I think is a reasonable teaching speed and linger touch on the follow a tad longer than is reasonably necessary for the observer. If they struggle to learn, which is rather common, then I will halve the speed and thus twice the time. I will add additional explanations, too the second time around which basically triples the duration of touch. No one questions it, as no one knows or could precisely know the correct amount of time the second time you have to slow something down.

Bad dancers make great wingmen when you are teaching in a demo. I fucking loved bad learners, they are the unintentional kings of giving you glorious kino opportunities and reveal how much calm patience you have. Plus, those guys will funnel you women like mad every night they are out, never treat these guys like a waste of time, unless they just never learn anything at all.

Body angling and angled hand placement

A key difference from demonstrating and teaching is that the observer is not constantly going to be at the viewing angle they need to be at and sometimes even within the same move action they need to see multiple different viewing points to see what you are doing. This means you either need to tell the observer to move, or you can physically move around your follow demo to give those viewing angles, the latter of which is more ideal for kino game.

I frequently use these strategies for demonstrating neck dips, where I have to first move all of their hair out of the way which is already a more intimate kino act already, followed by holding it out of the way and making my hand placement firm and clear, usually having to repeat it for the observer if the observer didn't understand it well enough. Meaning I have to hold her hair and neck sometimes for a few minutes.

Similarly on regular dips, turning them and explaining those to the observer often keeps the follows very close to my body and there is a lot of full-frontal torso contact for an extended moment, and I have to keep them upright and stable, which means it is not only close but firm contact. Sometimes I have to angle them into my body, sometimes I have to angle them away and it demonstrates strength and control. All good things. Moving them like a ragdoll really emphasizes how male you are and how female they are and being that close to someone builds attraction whether they like it or not.

You can linger and emphasize on your follow's body parts for the observer as well, just as you would do teaching the follow, except you can do it even longer, because you are talking and explaining while doing so.

Spotting

If the guy or guy(s) you are teaching with your demo are over by where you are teaching and they don't have a partner (i.e. your follow is the only chick available over there) it is not uncommon for the demo to be fine being their follow for a moment to show them.

This is a great kino opportunity as the guys usually are bad at learning and you can hold her up and support her body up and catch her if he does bad or drops her. Oftentimes you will have to adjust her body like a mannequin as well and you can still do the touch and tell technique on your follow to show him where to put his hands, etc. And because she is often being held crooked you can grab her hips and rotate her into place and linger for a second or two while you talk.

Intermission kino

Often is the case that the dude will have a friend or a follow or a girlfriend/wife he will have available so it will usually be you kino'ing the soul out of your follow and then him and his person trying the move at the same time or after the demo.

Unless you have to spot them for safety this gives you a moment to chat it up with your demo in between teaching as they work. You can pat her on the shoulder while thanking her or hold her shoulder or lower back or something while you watch them try to the move. I usually do this after I finish part of the move with the follow and then keep my hand there while seeming distracted by the other couple. If the couple messes up resume demo work and rinse and repeat whatever works.

After the people get the help you showed them, you can hug or two-handed high-five with squeeze your follow again and then preferably ask her to dance right away and work your magic on the dance floor some more.

IV | When To Switch To Standard Game Kino

Obviously, you get a lot of subtle and plausible deniability kino and escalation from dance kino, but there should be a point where you should recognize she is very comfortable with you and interested in more. If you can recognize that she is comfortable and interested just switch to normal kino escalation, she's waiting for it. ESPECIALLY if she's touching you back and initiating her own touches and lingering her own hands on your body, which they will often do.

Like I said, timewasters always sort themselves out when you resort to regular kino and regular game. Regular kino is your best filtering mechanism in the end as comfort with dance kino doesn't always translate to actual intent or interest in banging you, even if they like it. You still need some regular game to seal deals.

Often times interested girls will flip a switch when they cross the threshold of sufficient interest and you have not yet made a move. They will often make the move for you in a lot of cases but they won't go so far as to kiss you. So you need to either make plans for find a way to kiss them there or after you walk them to you car, which is better.

V | Social Considerations

This guide would be incomplete if I didn't issue some very real, valid warnings.

I've been in this scene for almost 5 years now and if you are a good dancer and good looking as well you will notice women, especially if they have any alcohol in them at all, and salty dudes, will take it too far sometimes.

Taken women

I cannot stress enough of this point but a lot of the women who respond the hardest to dance kino are taken women: dude's girlfriends or wives. I suspect it's because compared to a strong, confident, and skilled lead, their guy is either a beta, has no game, or some combination of factors. It is a sad Red Pill, but alas, I regret to inform you: women. I can't even estimate the amount of women who have crossed boundaries. They will seek out your touch if you even gave them crumbs. Avoid Kino.

Snakes and haters

If you are really good at dance kino it will bring out all the haters from women doing * touch touch touch * all night on you. It is what it is, be prepared for it and tune out the noise. Shrug it off and laugh.

Women you aren't interested in

This is probably a lesser thought about consequence, but don't exhibit good dance kino with women you have no interest in, they will just invest in you like flies investing in shit. Keep it formal.

Final Thoughts

I honestly really don't think women consciously realize they are getting really close to and turned on by you when you are doing subtle or extended dance kino. I actually truly believe that the plausible deniability and the social "it's just a dance" culture is so strong that they don't consciously process how much they like good, long touch that isn't overt flirting.

They might consciously recognize that they are interested in you and yet at the same time does not have any idea the good touching is actually having the effect it is having on their lizard brain regions. But it definitely works, and it works well.

Good luck, have fun out there.

~VRX