he girls: They do this on purpose to see if the guys will chase, plot twist if he doesn't chase a bit he's out. Said they never provide alternatives as they got options/plans enough, and if they think the dude is hot they don't want to seem easy.

Yeah, women SAY this.

Everything women say is designed to make them look good.

This is absolutely not true.

It's all designed to make her look good / attractive / powerful.

I made out with her, I thought she was cute beyond a hookup and asked her out and get hit with the classic I'd love to but have plans that day / those days without proposing alternatives.

Right.

She says "Sorry, busy on Wednesday". You say "Gotcha, no problem". That's it. You don't chase because that lowers your value relative to hers. If she wants you to chase, 99% of the time it's because she's not interested but wants to be chased for its own sake. ie nothing for you.

This has happened more then a few times already.

Sure. The trick is to be indifferent when she has plans. Reply, be polite, happy even, but thoroughly indifferent to her having other plans.

'Baking' is another one both sides do, waiting x amount of days on purpose and the whole thing become a fight to see who cares less.

Yes, but my experience is that women are not good at this.

You should have so many options that a woman not replying for three days is a blessing.

You partially fix this by replying at random intervals... sometimes in minutes, sometimes not answering her direct question for 36 hours.

The girls openly said in real interactions the men (only the men they want of course) have all the power but they try to grab it back during the texting/planning phases of next dates...

The girls SAID.

And there's your problem.

And she's only talking about her behaviour with men they like. They aren't talking about the leading on of hundreds of men who are only there to buoy up her ego.

The further you get on the first interaction the harder they try to grab back the control and play games/tests. Even when they are thinking about the men they want...

Look, all this happens..... but if you're hot, and have options, it's not that hard to navigate around all this shit.

What they are saying just isn't true about how women actually are.

In my experience when a woman is interested she'll make everything reallllllllllllllll fucking easy. She might lay out a tiny shit test... be slightly difficult about something..... minor inconveniences that are easily batted aside.

Example: Friend A met hot dude at party, she thinks he's above her so she has to play 'girlgame' to even it out. She denies him the date a few times then blames him for being low effort so it wouldn't have worked out anyway, it's of course never her fault... The dude couldn't win here anyway, if he kept insisting he's a simp, if he cuts his losses he keeps his dignity but doesn't get the girl.

Right.

So the guy, if he even wanted her, needs to show enough comfort to her that she is ready to invest rather than being scared.

The unstated parts here are that guys do need to be good at seduction....... but what these girls are saying is 99% horseshit.

Don't ask a fish how to catch fish.

It seems a beta breaker could be useful in 2026, don't do what everyone else does... Surely the great minds here must be able to come up with some adjustments besides keep doing the same and add more quantity?

Sure.

1. Be attractive
2. Comfort
3. Have lots of options and a full life.

No hacks needed

I did try to escalate a number of times got as far as starting to take off her bra but she refused.

In the kitchen? With housemates? I don't blame her.

She did tell me to leave a number of times in a "soft" way by saying I should get the train home but that could have been a shit test I guess.

The trick here is to take her seriously, start packing up, start leaving, and then go back in for "one more kiss", along with "Yeah, I've only got a few minutes"

You want to disarm her "will this guy ever leave", without leaving.

My second question is I tried to arrange another "date" and she said "haha.. like you didnt like it (inside joke) and I could be free maybe wednesday though I could't be sure now"

Ok, a few things to unpack here.

By saying not sure, she is taking a step back, so you have to take a step back, eg "yeah.... I've got something on Wednesday, sounds like we're both pretty busy".

The point is: she steps back, YOU step back. Not permanently, but when she takes a position of "mayyyyyyyyyyybe", then you need to avoid being the chaser as that puts you lower value than her. Solution: verbally reduce your commitment and imply you have other things going on (don't state them).

Second thing: never agree to the next date straight away. Date..... then leave it a few days. I know your instinct is to lock in "nearly sex, therefore sex next time", but this sort of thing comes across as needy and really you want her to be a bit unsure, a bit uncertain. She wants to be terrified of losing you, not certain of the next date.

You don't have to ignore her for three days, but definitely don't agree to seeing her again straight away.

so I guess my best strategy is to see other women

always!

(I have a few lined up) and go silent for now on this Kenyan and see how it pans out?

Never passive.

Think more like....... unpredictable / teasing. Sometimes reply straight away. Sometimes busy for 36 hours. Lead her on a bit emotionally...... chances are she needs it to feel fully attracted.