AnubiswithaDNR
14h ago TheRedPill
How to ask a colleague out? There’s mutual interest but i’m trying to be cautious as we’ll be working together for few month and want to play it safe.
1y ago The Hub
Shall i call her out on it? This might be a silly thing
Do it, then write us a field report about how disrespectful she was for then calling you out on first telling her you might not be free tonight!
1y ago The Hub
My girl, 2 days ago said she wanna come over to my place to hang out tonight. Texted me today saying she got invited to a friend’s birthday, and hoping that’s fine with me.
Just to mention i had a long day today at work and said to her will let you know if i can be free this evening.
Shall i call her out on it? This might be a silly thing to even make a post about but i see it slightly disrespectful.
1y ago The Hub
@TwoInchesOfShaft the relationship is more like girlfriend/boyfriend currently but i’ve refused exclusivity to keep my options open but then it’s not working for me as it’d always feel like cheating if i hook up with someone else.
I’m 29 and limiting my option to one girl feels like missing out on other experiences, even tho i’m well aware that i’m quite lucky to find someone like her.
1y ago The Hub
The girl i’m saying for more than a year now is trying to control sex lately by bringing up excuses (body image insecurity, tired, not horny, periods).
Before this started, she brought up the talk and asked for commitment but I said I wasn’t ready.
I’m not willing to bend her way after putting sex on the table. Any advice on that?
2y ago Red Pill Me
I developed oneitis to one of my plates despite abundance. When i sleep with other women, i feel horrendous as if i’m cheating. I’ve thinking to go into LTR with her as she has been a real trooper for 7 months now.
However, i cannot deny that i’m still conflicted and would like to keep my options open.
I only see her once a week and we mostly text for logistics. Tried to disappear for some time and keep busy with other girls but it still feels like drugs when i’m with her.
Thoughts on how to cure oneitis?
2y ago TheRedPill
I’m currently spinning 3 plates and i’m always looking over my shoulders when i’m out with one of them out of fear of being caught. It’s the first time to spin more than 2 plates at a time so i’m not sure how to manage it. I live in a moderately big city, however there’s always a slim possibility to come across someone you know.
Main plate is now asking for exclusivity and I didn’t give a clear answer but i denied my interest in other girls.
This is a new territory for me, so any advice or any link to read would be appreciated.
I can't do better than to redirect you to my reply to your last question. You're going to need to adopt a more relaxed and honest attitude about your situation of dating multiple women. If they ask, don't deny that you're seeing other women, but never provide specifics regarding who they are, or how invested you might be into any one of them.
When on a date with any of them, the one in front of you should be your only concern in that moment. When you're out with Sandra, you shouldn't be thinking about Sarah. When you're out with Sarah, you shouldn't be imagining Gertrude. And when you're out with Gertrude, you shouldn't be planning your next date with Grushenkha.
At this point, it reads like you may want advice regarding additional strategies and tactics in regards to handling the women in your life. Classic Carry Grant films tend to be good as they present what are still very plausible situations a man finds themselves in when dealing with women. I couldn't say how well they work translated into other languages, if you're not an English primary speaker, but they're a good place to start.
Read More2y ago Red Pill Me
@carnold03 absolutely insightful comment. I guess i’m exploring the theory and yet to have a good grasp of it, but it’s good to hear an honest remark and I’ll definitely look into the suggested references. Thank you sir!
2y ago Red Pill Me
I’m currently spinning 3 plates and i’m always looking over my shoulders when i’m out with one of them out of fear of being caught. It’s the first time to spin more than 2 plates at a time so i’m not sure how to manage it. I live in a moderately big city, however there’s always a slim possibility to come across someone you know.
Main plate is now asking for exclusivity and I didn’t give a clear answer but i denied my interest in other girls.
This is a new territory for me, so any advice or any link to read would be appreciated.
I've got to agree with @jprdl here, it doesn't strike me that you're spinning plates, but rather dating three different females. While this is without a doubt an admirable feat, from the anxiety it's inspired you to have, you're beginning to realize the challenge you've created for yourself. You've also made things potentially more complicated by lying to one regarding only dating her. When you lie, you create a work of fiction you've got to keep track of and who you told it to, which only amplifies the anxiety. Unless you fear for your safety don't do it. It undermines confidence as you'll eventually blunder, so stop. While you can omit information, lying isn't in your best interests.
Consider investing in a reliable ready reference you can pick up and study to better prepare yourself for engaging the opposite sex. I'd suggest that you get yourself a copy of Doc Love's "The System: The Dating Dictionary". Doc Love, also known as the late Tom Hodges, wrote a weekly advice column that's archive is mirrored on several sites and a podcast. While his media is a bit pricey, it's a solid foundation a guy can branch out from, but I would also suggest you review his advice column to decide if his view on dating and relationships is aligned with what you aspire for yourself. To save yourself a search, give this scribed link a gander to find out if his book is something you'd like to add to your library.
The next time you're with the girl you lied to, if she or any other girl brings up exclusivity, jokingly tell her you don't know if the other women you're dating will be entirely ok with that. When she asks why you lied before, and she will ask, tell her that some women tend to get angry knowing that they've got competition, and that you didn't want to put that pressure on a girl.
There's no need for her, or any of them to know how many women you're ever actually dating or who they are. However, an interesting phenomena with females is that oftentimes they will work harder to win a man knowing they've got competition for him. In your situation, you claim to actually have it, so why lie about it if it can work in your favor?
You managed to get yourself into dating three women at once. Why lie to them? Why care if anyone of them leaves you if you're not interested or ready to be exclusive with any of them? Them departing frees up space to invite another. Why are you doubting your ability to attract another in such a situation now?
Read More2y ago Red Pill Me
I’m currently spinning 3 plates and i’m always looking over my shoulders when i’m out with one of them out of fear of being caught. It’s the first time to spin more than 2 plates at a time so i’m not sure how to manage it. I live in a moderately big city, however there’s always a slim possibility to come across someone you know.
Main plate is now asking for exclusivity and I didn’t give a clear answer but i denied my interest in other girls.
This is a new territory for me, so any advice or any link to read would be appreciated.