when i reinforce behaviours in a girl, i often do so covertly. For examples, your pleasant and pretty today, you get lots of attention, your moody and bitching, im uninterested in you.

This is relatively simple behaviour management and girls often start responding positively and behaving well pretty quickly as they have many interactions and many reference points for learning what is good and bad and therefore how to get the attention she wants.

Some behaviours however are either rare occurrences or hard to praise/reinforce immediately (if your not currently with her but she left you food or a gift etc), when i then give her the attention she craves im worried shes not associating this with the behaviour she did, as it was yesterday that she left the food i like in the fridge, and the praise is coming 24hours later for one thing she did, how would she know shes rewarded for that specifically?

My solution to this thus far has been to continue rewarding when you can and with enough scenarios, she will have gathered enough subconscious positive and negative feedback data that she will associate the good behaviour with the reward, eventually, just from the rare senario happening enough times, shell get it.

Im now wondering if there is a quicker way, a way to reinforce this behaviour strongly FIRST TIME. Is it a good strategy to be more overt in your reward? to tell her directly "i liked what u did there, the food you left was good, come on lets go out for a meal today i fancy some chinese". This is still somewhat overt but still seems genuine.

And why is it that we use covert strategies when working on a woman, i feel as though i subconsciously understand why but cant phrase it and probably dont understand it deeply.

Why use the technique of attention modulation rather that tellilng her "dont talk to me like that" "can you make me better meals" "can we just have more sex" so much more effective?

This would feel so weird to do and obviously wouldnt work but why? why is this an unattractive way for a man to act from her perspective? whats she thinking and what does it show?

Of course, sometimes overt communication is good. Its masculine and shows where you draw a boundary she cant cross. But ALL overt communication would be very unattractive, is there an obvious explanation for when and why to use either form of speech? Again i think i have a good instinct for when its good and when its not but i couldn't verbalise it, i couldnt write WHY it is the way it is to an alien. Any opinions?

Teach her to value marriage or teach her your willing to walk away?

I've dated girls before and my previous approach has been to reinforce and let a girl know im only down to fuck with a girl who is a girl of strong commitment, essentially saying "I have a standard and you better be willing to prove yourself".

She will know that I have this opinion through subtle social cues or directly telling her. Ive recently had a rethink, how does this compare to being a guy who comes across as more "allowing" when it comes to breakups, divorces etc?

Will this draw stronger or weaker commitment from a woman in an LTR.

There seem to be a few pros and cons from each approach.

Option 1: A girl thinking you only want to date if shes a woman of high commitment -

Pros

if she respects you she will try to become this person for you and show you how committed she really is. She may also start subconsciously embodying this personality trait, so, becoming more blinder focused on just you. Deleting contacts to other guys etc.

If she sees you as her main option she cant have a great option while also window shopping for other guys to monkey branch to. Eg she knows if she wants you she will have to become someone who is committed to you and you only

Cons

She may think your insecure about breakups or divorce because you have scares options

OR

Option 2: A girl thinking your pretty laid back about breakups or divorce and relationships are just something you let go, your not too fussed about a breakup

Pros

She may think you have this mindset because you have an abundance of options

She thinks your secure in yourself as you are sure of your abilities to attract another woman after her

(These feels are proven when a girl breaks up with a guy, he says “ok” and she suddenly second-guesses herself)

Cons

you may not get the benefits from option 1

Whats your opinion on this and what approach do you personally take?

Also how does it differ in game vs LTR?