but YOU don't go well.

Where I was either pregnant or acutely recovering from a pregnancy...

2in1

What everyone says plus: she wants to keep all her competition away from men to increase her chances as a woman for a partner and decrease chances of women to find out that there is actually a normal\succeful way to go about dating (and keeping it a secret eliminates the competition and keeps her in a business of unhappy women coming for coaching).

Analogy

I was a keen mushroom picker in my earlier life. There was abundance of forest around but some places were better than other every season, some places had species that would grow only in specific place and also change every season.

As a keen mushroom hunter I was not only keeping me spots secret but also misleading my competition. To make sure I will benefit from the spots Instill had to get up with the first sun and arrive to the spot, few miles away, before anyone else that would also know this place.

After all anyone could go to the exactly same places, arive earlier etc.

Only huge difference is. No one would starve because I've provided misleading info so it wasn't morally shaky.

Aging Woman dating coach on the other side....

Random Thoughts (Sunday Edition)

If you were to ask me if I like steak, I would say “Hell yes! I LOVE steak!”

If you were to offer me a steak, I would gladly eat it.

If, on the other hand, you were to point to a pile of vomit on the floor and say “that is a Pre-owned steak, would you like some?

I’m hoping you would guess my answer (Hint - it is not “yes”)

The reason why I would not want a regurgitated steak is because I want a new steak. One that has not been previously eaten. It is simply how I prefer my steak.

If you were to take one bite of the steak, and offer me the rest, I would likely accept your offer. Just one piece cut out of a good steak does not ruin it. Following this line of reasoning, if you were to get down to one final bit of steak, I would likely decline. I don’t even have a reason. This idea simply does not appeal to me. Who knows why?

Similarly, if you were to give me a steak on a plate, and one corner of the steak has clearly been chewed on by a human (many of you have done this as children), and the meat was still there- but the juice was sucked out. I may accept the steak, cut that part off and go to town.

After all, I REALLY like steak.

I suspect you see where this is going, so go there we shall…

I cannot speak for anyone else but myself, but the more of that steak that is damaged or chewed up in any way, the less likely I am to want to eat that particular steak. This does not negate the fact that I LOVE STEAK!

One could argue that steak in any form - from freshly grilled to vomit stage - would be a meal for countless animals in a forest. Small animals and microbes seeking food would enjoy the meal. In fact, a staving human might even eat such a thing out of sheer desperation. Stories of much worse things have been documented.

Personally, I have eaten at top restaurants in cities across the globe. French food in Paris and NY, Italian food, Thai, Peruvian, Indian, etc. I have lived a good life. And perhaps because of this, I have become somewhat spoiled. Not a food snob, but just a discerning palate and an appreciation for good food.

Fresh, well cooked food in a clean welcoming environment that is designed for my enjoyment is always preferable to the alternatives. Why would one want to pay for rotten, undercooked, improperly prepared, under-spiced food? One might pay, but not a lot. I think this stands to reason.

Women are NOT food.

However…..

I would prefer a woman who is exclusive, fresh, clean, well behaved, kind, and feminine to name just a few traits. I do not think this is an unreasonable want or expectation. Women have their 6-6-6 requirements - these are mine.

A woman who has had more than a certain number of sexual partners is not going to appeal to me the way a less experienced woman will; when it comes to a LTR. The more partners, the more “used up” a woman appears. Interestingly enough, she need not even tell you her body count - anymore than you need to ask how many people chewed the left half of your NY Strip steak. It has clearly been chewed up - the number of chewers is irrelevant.

And past another undetermined number of lovers (10 seems to be the statistical breaking point in terms of suitability for marriage), she can be seen as something akin to vomit.

WOMEN ARE NOT VOMIT!

But from a perspective of attractiveness, some women are outright repulsive to me.

I do not have a reason. I don’t offer any reasons and I refuse to respond to someone who might ask. it is simply a visceral reaction that is rooted in my deepest instincts as man.

I have driven and walked by women on the streets who appear to be very heavy drug users offering prostitution. This is repulsive to me. I do NOT hate these women, nor do I pity them. They are there for whatever reasons, and I am moving along. But the LAST thing I think about when I see such women is “Ooh, look! A potential wife and wholesome sex partner!”

They have the same effect on me as seeing a pile of vomited steak on the ground. It is something one should not touch with bare hands, and perhaps it should be cleaned up. Women are humans, not objects or vomit. But they can be equally repulsive.

Now some men, who are STARVING for sex and affection may have little choice but to frequent such services from such women. I get that. But that is not me - nor is it the average man. Are there exceptions? I have no doubt. But I cannot speak to that.

So when you are with a new woman, and you’re in the talking stage, you will likely sense some things about here - how attractive would be the obvious first thing. Then comes attitude, values, habits, etc.

What is harder to determine early on is her sexual experience. Women have learned to hide this very well.

(Side Wisdom Nugget: If a woman says she has had 5 or 6 lovers, she is lying. It is their go-to number)

Her sexual technique will be the first giveaway. If she is great in bed, then she likely has some experience. And there is nothing wrong with that. If she is great in bed, plus she goes out a lot with her female friends, then there’s a red flag for you. I need not recount all the red flags here. Many others have covered the topic of red flags - arguably the best is Rich Cooper on YouTube.

So watch for those red flags.

And remember this - if your instincts start to bother you, your subconscious is speaking to you. LISTEN. Sometimes it is saying “This is vomit. Do NOT EAT THE VOMIT”

Have a good day.