We all know what the Red Pill is – what it means, where it comes from, the different facets, and the fact that it is not quite the same to every man who discusses it. Similarly, the White and Black and other Pills have their own meanings.

I have said this many times, here and elsewhere: The Black Pill is a stop on your journey, not a final destination. But, it recently struck me that the same can be said of MGTOW, the White Pill, and the Red Pill.

I was just watching a video by huMAN. If you haven't checked him out yet, please do. He is a very calm, rational, and thoughtful man who seems to have hit his stride in life. In this video, he said something that hit me hard, so I thought I would share it here.

He was discussing the passing of his father and how it fundamentally changed him. He shared how he suddenly felt that life got serious: “No more F-ing around” as he put it. He also posited that “You become the final man you’ll be after your father passes”

This resonated for me, because I too changed fundamentally when my father died.

As I listened, it also struck me that this transformation from whatever we are before and after our father’s passing, has nothing to do with women. The other huge transformation in my life was divorce, which hurt much worse in several ways, and that had everything to do with women. Not just my wife, but the new awareness that came along with that journey. Remember, for some of us, divorce is not an event; it is a long process that involves discovery (Red Pilling or otherwise).

He then suggested that such changes can cause a man to become more open, more honest, more truthful, and more authentic. I THOUGHT I was all that when I was married, but man was I wrong. It took a few years for me to re-center myself around my core values. I have shared them here before. And with all this in mind, here are a few things that I picked up along the way, and I hope they help you in some way:

• As much as our problems seem to involve our relationships with women, they truly are of our own making.
• Life is more about developing a proper mindset and taking action, than any particular ideology, movement, or techniques.
• The men who are in the midst of their Red Pill, Black Pill, grieving process, Divorce, breakup, MGTOW, White Pill, Blue Pill, or Monk Mode journey, are the ones most likely to disagree with others who deviate from what THEY believe to be "the way”
• When your father dies, you had better be prepared for what comes after. It is as profound a life change as there is. And much of what we consider to be “X Y or Z Pill knowledge", is likely nothing more than “My Father's Wisdom.”
• Have a set of values that you claim as your own. If they come solely from a bible, or other ancient text, then you are doing it wrong. Find YOUR values. Write them down, and then LIVE them.
• Without the pain that comes with a profound loss, we cannot fully experience the transformations these events initiate. That is not to say that all wisdom or transformations MUST involve pain. Nor is it to say that pain ALWAYS results in perspective transformations. They just tend to correlate quite often. So it is helpful to see this as an opportunity.

Finally, these things hit us all very differently. Hell, the ways I handled adversity at 20 years old is quite different than how I handle it now. So it stands to reason that the impact of these experiences will vary from one man to another.

But the important thing to remember a few things:

1. Stop chasing a destination; the journey never ends if you are doing it properly. Once you settle into that fact you will be much better off in the long run. The term “embrace the suck” comes to mind.
2. The Red Pill and MGTOW, for example, are merely stops along your journey. You, and only you, can decide if that is where you will stay forever. Once you come to terms with that very important choice, then you can stay as long as you need to; you heal up, pack up your gear and get ready for what comes next. What comes next is entirely up to you. But if you pay attention to men who have been divorced, lost their fathers, have achieved any sort of success, and are calm and rational, you will learn a lot about what your next step might be.
3. Finally, one of the key elements of almost all these different philosophies, movements, or mindsets, is this: We must define ourselves and structure our lives around our values and how we live them. Disabusing ourselves of the struggle to attract women is one of the hardest steps at all because that is biologically programmed into us, and burned in by society.

One you do this (let go of all these pills - blue or otherwise), fully and completely, only then will you be able to meaningfully pursue your true final form

Tip deeplydisturbed for their post.