I drive a taxi part-time til I die, meaning 12+hrs a shift, easily, so I meet a quite a few people through out the days and nights. Now,

I don't prey on drunk girls. I learned my lesson the hard way by letting a girl come over when she's had a few too many in her, like a stubborn mule. It's my preferred method though. Really hammers it home.

Anyhooe, I'm finally on my first weekend night shift, so I'm expecting lots of drunk folks, and seeing how the customer base has been a particular group of people, I'd be surprised if I ended up going home alone at the end of my night. Unfortunately, I also have to go back to driving at 11am! So, the bars are all closed and it's after 2am and I'm ready to go home. I decide to swing by one of the clubs in town for one last customer, and this lady flags me down, hops in and pre-pays so she could go and find her friends. She finds out their at the neighbouring hotel, I drive there, they get in and we're off.

Getting close to their destination, the original passenger asks me where I'm from, I tell her where in my native tongue. BOOm! pure excitement from the back. "Shitty Town!???!" she translates. "Too bad she's blonde" I thought to myself. We arrive, then the Blonde says she wants to go buy some booze and that her friends are going to meet her there to split the cab. Got the booze, the friends and then we're at their destination. I get her number and I tell her I'll text her, maybe.

4am rolls around, back and fourth texting, I brought up something about seeing the titanic and crying myself to sleep, she calls me a pussy, I tell her to come wipe my tears away. I pick her up, bring her back and then she asks "you meet a lot of ppl?"..."what a dumb fuckin question" I said to myself. "of course." and then she takes 2 loads: on the mask 1st, down the pipe for the 2nd. +1.

I also go to University full time, working Saturday mornings on campus.

Meet Ms. White Chocolate Hater: Irish-Polish-Ukrainian brunette with a tremble in her voice. She's a talker. Very extroverted, cusses, talks like a guy. I fucked up by not treating her as such. Foul mouthed and feminine. Busty. Every time I speak to her, I can't help but picture an anxious, little girl (no pedo).

I was sitting in a little area with couches after my morning class and was facing the West wall, so I could make eye contact with passer-by's, and boom, she walks into my peripheral, hard eye contact from the get-go. I love eye fucking her, so I wait for her to sit to stop listening to my music. I can feel my heart rate pick up- "I have to go move my car or I'm going to get a ticket!" I like listening to her speak, but she says a whole lot of fuck all. She tells me she's working a booth for sex-ed, when along -negative smv friend comes and says "we need t o eat together sumtime!", like the whale doesn't eat enough already! She mentions hockey, She's a fan of the local team. She feels bad cause my team sucks this yr. Shocking. She said "fuck" before me. She tells me how much free time she has, even going as far as til after classes end. I ask her how long she's doing the sex thing, blah blah, blah, remind her to go move her car, I get her number and realize I hate texting and I'm learning quickly! Logistics! She's an ear-rapist. Fuck.

onto the next...

I've always wanted to meet someone who was as at least enthusiastic about music as I am, if not as passionate. The other day, thanks to my being a cabbie, got to meet an Asian, School of Music grad. Great! She's going to the other side of town for a concert at a school.

ME: you a composer or conductor or...what

FINGERLING: I'm a pianist

"wanna start a band?!" I say half jokingly. "yes!!" she replies, high-five from me!

Time for a bit of history: Been playing piano forever "cause her mom was one of 'those' parents", playing cello for half her life. I hate texting, but I'm going to get her number and call her instead. Lovely, it's a landline. Pays for the cab with a $20 + $1. tip: "keep the change, its okay!" "Have a nice day!" I say before she runs away.

Ms. Night: Got her feeling comfortable with me from the start. Facialised 1st, "I usually swallow!", and then swallowed 2nd. She asked me the classic: "how many gals" (I'm a virgin!) "not with the way you were moving...srsly!" (69!) "wow"; She tells me I'm #15. Had a landing strip and a nice looking cooter. Very athletic, christian family, nerd, smokes weed, fun to chill with, and has a mean dick sucking face.

Ms. Racist Against Chocolate..lesson learned: fuck texting. Didn't pedastalize, so maybe there's a chance. But I'm not waiting around to find out.

Ms. Fingerling...call ya, maybe. Going to use the "should get coffee with me so we can talk band names". aaaaaaand.....WhY sO sErIoUs?

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