Men: Imagine being a woman. Just for a minute, all jokes aside.

One day you meet a man, and he seems absolutely perfect in every way. Scan your list for green flags – he has ALL of them.

But…

He appears to be a carpenter.

You look around his house at this amazing furniture and remark on its beauty and craftsmanship. And he says “oh yeah, I made that”.

You are thoroughly impressed and say “I didn’t know you were a carpenter”

He replies with “Don’t EVER say that. I am NOT a carpenter. Why would you accuse me of being a carpenter?

Aghast, you stop. “Well, I just see all this amazing work you’ve done…and… I’m sorry”

He looks annoyed and the mood of the evening slowly gets back to normal.

The next weekend you pull into his driveway and see hm working in the garage. The garage is a little larger than most, and he is cutting some wood. So you ask “Hey, whatcha building?”

And he responds “None of your business!” as he hides the thing he’s making, behind his back.

Again, your jaw drops and you’re starting to feel weird about this guy. Like WTF is his problem? So you decide maybe he’s just in a mood. Or maybe he is making YOU a gift. So you let it go.

You look around and realize that you are standing in one of the most well-equipped carpentry workshops you’ve ever seen. All those home improvement, fix uppies, and flipperoney shows could not hold a candle to this man’s workshop. You are duly impressed.

That Saturday evening you have dinner, drinks, chill for a bit, make love, get up and get a snack, and you’re lying in bed feeling all loved up. So you figure you will try to broach this odd subject.

You start: “Babe, I need to ask you something but I don’t want you to get upset or react. Can you handle this?”

“Of course” he replies.

You continue: “It’s about the carpentry thing”.

His body language changes.

Tentatively you offer - "You have made so much of this gorgeous furniture in your house.”

“Yeah. Soo…” he replies.

“And your workshop is unbelievable. Hell, I am jealous, and I don’t even do Carpen….uh woodw… Uh. Make things”

“What’s your point” he snaps.

“Why do you get so upset when I call you a carpenter?”

“BECAUSE I AM NOT ONE. And I think it is unfair for you to keep calling me one when I clearly have a full time job and hobbies that have nothing to do with carpentry. Is surfing carpentry? NO. Is my work as an Accountant carpentry? NO. How about golf, tennis, MMA classes, and the dozens of other things I do for fun? Are THEY carpentry?

“No” you meekly reply.

He continues “I don’t like it when you call me a carpenter because I am not one. Just because I built my entire house and most of the furniture in it, and just because I have that awesome completely decked out workshop, does not make me a carpenter. In fact, what I do cannot even be considered carpentry.

It’s more like DIY wood projects."

…

So you sit on that for a minute.

The night ends, you go home.

It feels weird now.

…

Just because someone does carpentry, does not mean they want to claim the title. No matter how much it may appear to be true, this guy wants to be a carpenter but he does not want the title. He wants to DO carpentry, but he does not want to BE one. Hell, he does not even realize that what he does all the time, is considered to be a carpenter's work by everyone else on the planet. Except him and his like minded netizens.

The same is true with a woman whose entire life is set up for cheating. One who has an entire life constructed to do whatever she wants, with whomever she wants, whenever she wants it. And she is free to do so at her whim.

And if said woman has secret contacts on her phone, male friends, goes out drinking with her friends on the weekend, travels solo or with another woman, works out obsessively, has a male masseuse or chiropractor, wears tight clothing, and has carved out lots of time to be away from you and unresponsive, she is perfectly set up for cheating.

That does not mean that she IS cheating, it’s just that her life and her way of moving in the world is indistinguishable from that of a cheater.

Period.

And anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is gaslighting you. And such a person is likely either another woman or a male feminist/ally. It's always the same.

And if she ever admits to you that she has cheated in the past, then she IS DEFINITELY a cheater, by definition.

But if you ever call her a cheater, she will likely get pissed off. She wants the life, but not the title.

And just like with our carpenter friend, one must ask oneself – what the hell is wrong with a person who openly does something regularly, proficiently, and without fear of judgment, but then gets all bunched up at being labeled the very thing they very obviously are?

Tip deeplydisturbed for their post.