Ok so by default I’m not a pushover but I’m not a mean person either. And although I can be borderline evil to people who cross me I try to treat most people neurally. Sadly that’s already an improvement for me as I used to try to be nice to everyone because it’s how I would have liked to be treated. Clearly we live in a world that doesn’t do that but unfortunately sees it as “weakness.”
However I’m really struggling to finally cross over and just be a bastard to people unless they earn me not treating them as such. For example hate playing mind games with chicks, a lot of people talk about it like they enjoy it and it’s fun but I just can’t get into it. I have to force myself to do it out of necessity, I’m struggling to enjoy “the game” if you will.
Now full transparency, I hated doing the same before but it was out of laziness. I didn’t want to learn game, polarization, push pull, etc. My ego didn’t want to let me admit that I was raised wrong for the modern world and that I sucked at taking to chicks and to some extent still do. I hated that I had to analyze every interaction to try to figure out what was going on and I hated how fucking mentally exhausting it was. But now it’s completely different.
I’m better at all of that now and most of it is now subconscious. But I’m still struggling to “enjoy” it. I’m consciously aware every girl I’m taking to is trying to play mind games with me. I’m consciously aware that if I don’t act and become a manipulative asshole it negatively impacts my success rate for getting laid and keeping plates. I’m consciously aware that if I don’t act like a selfish bastard the world isn’t going to give me shit. But even knowing that and it being at the forefront of my mind I still struggle with “doing what needs to be done” so to speak. If any of you have dealt with this and overcame it I’d appreciate some help.
quietus 2y ago
I think because there are no tribes or families anymore, which your traits would be welcome, it does not work. You have to adapt to an unnatural world, which is why you don't like it. I don't think anyone really likes these games or modern women honestly.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
You do realize if you act like a piece of shit that people will not respond well to it right?
Your strategy for forcibly being a piece of shit unless they "earn being treated differently" makes no sense. Naturally no one will behave in a way that "earns" anything from you because you've already set a baseline for being unlikeable.
This is how you attract damaged, low self-esteem people into your life who grew up being treated poorly and can't expect anything different and repel decent people who have no tolerance for being greeted by an asshole out the gate.
No wonder your progress is being hindered
There's a massive difference between being a wimpy pushover nice guy and being a decent person that naturally commands respect by the way they carry themself.
jormigaso 2y ago
Can you elaborate? I'm having issues for behaving like alpha with my family, who were 'my friends', etc (basically sent to the trash to everybody because nobody earned my respect --and well I've been resentful overall, I just go all the day wanting to punch in the face everybody, feel so much rage for how everyone used me on my Bluepill days, so I hate everyone who is part of that dark past and that demanded that fucking nice guy, and did NOTHING for opening my eyes, as TRP did, so in short, the only people worth my respect/niceness are RP guys, and ppl that have helped me in a way or another--, so thought that was as red pill move, and that I was showing I was high value so they weren't worth my time)
I feel liberated and relaxed now, I think I need to move to make new friends, build a new life starting from 0, and live under TRP ideas till I die, like a Chad, pursuing excellence (forgot to add that most of my family is religious as fuck, which made them more blue pilled, so they could be in the extreme of the blue pill world, thinking I sold my soul to the devil lol, I fucking hate them and what they follow, I wish TRP was a religion because would pray every day)
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Here's an example of a nice guy (pushover) and then one of a decent guy.
does things for people even if it's not dignified or substantially one-sided. For example, all of the benefit goes to the other person, not to the nice guy. He's always polite to people even when they dick him over and disrespect him. The nice guy gets attention when he's being someone's lackey but the same people will never invite him to person events or hangouts.
Only offers his time to people that either matter, respect him, or are truly unable to help themselves and he just feels like helping. Doesn't let people milk him for his labor if they're also not going to have his back too when they need it.
People want him around and they know he's got better things to do so they appreciate when he's there for them. He's kind but not looking for the world to validate him by being nice to people.
The nice guy is looking for approval through kindness and the decent guy is just a good person who does what he does but with boundaries.
I'm a bit confused as to what your specific question is. If you clarify I'll answer.
There are a lot of reasons for people to disrespect you, you probably were being too nice at some point looking for validation.
You don't need to start over in a new town or city unless you have some serious reputational problem where you have that much infamy (which is unlikely) or the area you're in is so small that everyone knows each other on a first name basis.
You don't need other people to pursue excellence, you can do that on your own and other people will notice. Focus on being a somebody and people will notice. But do it for you, not for them
jormigaso 2y ago
thanks for your answer, it is clear now the difference
well basically a lot of ppl in my family was able to help me, knowing what I was going through, but they preferred inaction, and even laughed at my fucking face sometimes, I had a terrible childhood, etc, a very dark past that I won't enter into details here, the point is that I grew resentful of people overall, and later I faced TONS of bullying in high school too, add to that being a beta pussy that everyone took advantage of, and was virgin till 20yo, rejections on every fucking place, the point is: based on the experiences I decided to become kind of a bully this time, without remorse, to fuck everyone, I use that energy as motivation to go to the gym and to spend 14 hours in front of a pc trying to become the fucking best, I also disrespected those people (family, "friends", the motherfuckers that come to me for money, etc), I managed to lift, and to do well as a software engineer, still in early 20s, but basically now these people (mostly blue pilled) think I'm a child satan and hate me more.
In short, I kind of ghosted everyone and disrespected them like they did with me (without crossing the line, it was subtle like to make clear that they can go and fuck themselves, but only that, not like I killed somebody..), and I thought I could start a new life somewhere else (make new friends, enjoy a bit life, keep pursuing excellence), since where I live is small, and my reputation is that "I sold my soul to Satan" and people tend to avoid me overall, also at some point people tend to have some common relationship (common friends, know somebody, etc) with a person that was part of my dark pas (I don't want to have to see ever in my life anyone that knew me as the beta idiot I was, or that know about how fucked I was in childhood without parents, or the shit I had to go through)
My goal in life is to become something like Bobby Axelrod (if you watched billions show, you'll understand, if not here's a link: https://billions.fandom.com/wiki/Bobby_Axelrod) )) By 'new place' I meant maybe moving to the US, so my plan is to keep becoming great at programming and to try to get an H-1B or so. I just would like to enjoy life a bit, LIVING UNDER THE RED PILL TEACHINGS. The red pill is the only thing that served me in life, everything else (including religion) was fucking trash
That said the question is: how would you go about a situation like this if you were me? like what's TRP way to go from here
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2y ago
Distance yourself from everyone bringing you down, resist the urge to be a bully, and keep working on your goals.
If you think there are better opportunities abroad aim for that. You've just got to keep moving forward, everyone has shitty people in their lives that are better left in the past
coolsocks00 1 2y ago
This.
OP you have misunderstood some core aspects of TRP, that i honestly think a lot of guys get wrong. There is the aspect of understanding women, and then there is the aspect of Game.
The term AWALT stems from the fact that, while women's personalities can still vary a lot, they're going to behave according to their nature. And to get what you want from them you need to understand their nature.
Then you have Game, with all of it's nuance. By Game i mean all interpersonal skills that are relevant to seducing women. Tons of different "kinds" of Game work on women. Just take a look at all the different personalities that have success with women. You have the pure alpha asshole, e.g. drug dealer or violent criminal, you have a charismatic leader of men, there's the low energy and quiet seducer, and a high energy guy who's just fun for women. Plus everything between and more.
My point here is that you CAN actually "be yourself" more, in spite of what you often hear in RP spaces. What's important is that you change/evolve the most important, universally attractive qualities in a man. Develop good frame, become assertive and naturally dominant, value your time. Dont simp.
whytehorse2021 2y ago
It sounds like you are still blue pilled. You care what other people think about you. You have the "Do unto others as you would have done unto you" frame. This is part of the gynocentric social order lie that serves female mating strategy. It applies with men but not with women. Like if you punch a guy he's going to punch you back. If a woman punches a guy his hands are tied. So you're projecting what men value on to women. You're giving women a male frame.
This is sort of like what women do. They value success and dominance so they think men value that. We could actually care less. So when you're nice to women they could care less.